self esteem 101
Didactics at CPE this week was on Self esteem. Self esteem is a need, and a healthy self esteem is needed for growth in the spiritual life. It was very revealing for me to see how i have allowed others control over my self esteem, where in fact it is my personal responsibility (hence self esteem). According to the presenter, the main ingredient for a live-giving life is love of oneself, which is self esteem, Further, in her mind, the most important role of a leader is to create a space where self esteem can grow. I ventured that it seemed to me that healthy 'self esteems' would naturally undermine the need for hierarchy in a community.
Apparently the equation for self esteem (which is self-love) is:
self-knowledge + self-acceptance = self esteemYou can't love or accept yourself in a vacuum, so you need to know yourself first. 3 quotes on self-knowledge that stuck out for me were:
- "Self-knowledge is a prerequisite for holiness" - St Catherine of Sienna
- "Trials and unrest come because you do not know yourself" - St Theresa of Avila
- "Know yourself, but always doubt your motives" - a Rabbi
(BTW - should self esteem be written with a hyphen?)
2 comments:
"Know yourself, but always doubt your motives"
I so agree with this one. I've always felt that hearts are tricksy, and you usually have to understand two or three of your own motives before you come close to grasping why you've done a thing. The second and third are usually less flattering than the first (and often involve impressing a girl). But the first is usually also true.
very true, very true! in my one-on-ones with my supervisor it was amazing to see how complicated a single action of mine is. The real motive is very far away (and often has to do with my upbringing and insecurities and ego)
thanks for finding me here Cliff. hope all's well in NC.
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