In a month and a bit I start the next phase of my ‘mother city adventure’: a three month Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) unit at Groote Schuur Hospital. I first heard about CPE in Atlanta where I followed the experiences of fellow Columbia students with interest, admiration and sometimes fear. Although the ‘powers that be’ in my denomination would like me ordained yesterday, I feel this three month training is something that I would like to prioritise while I have the chance. So far I seem to have saved enough moolah to survive as a full time student again, and I think I’m ready for the challenge that March will bring. CPE is really small in SA, in fact this is the only site in the country. There are two supervisors and a group of 6 students. I finished the application essays and mailed them off a couple of days ago, so hopefully they arrive and I get in. Here is what I wrote in the essay concerning my understanding of CPE, goals for the course and how I envisage using my training upon completion:
Expectations for this CPE (Gareth Beyers)
From what I have read and heard from supervisors and students, CPE is supervised, interfaith professional education for ministry. Three areas stand out to me as core constituents of the program: personal reflection (on one’s pastoral identity), pastoral formation (group meetings and study) and practical competence (experience with crisis situations). I am especially interested in the integration of theological, psychological, and pastoral insights and what this will offer to my future pastoral function in a parish. Although it will be a tough 3 months, following the Greek aphorism “Know thyself”, it is an opportunity I would like to take while I am in the position to.
Having ‘discovered’ CPE whilst in the States, and seeing that many Presbyteries require at least one unit of it from their students, I followed their lead and thought it valuable in my own life too. Pastoral ministry needs inner strength and self awareness, something that a unit of CPE will most certainly provide as I will be challenged and taught in the area of pastoral relationships. I do strive, through journalling and other tools, to be reflective, and think this will help the personal growth and discoveries that I will stumble upon during the course.
The interfaith aspect of CPE will also be a crucial aspect to learn if I wish to work in the multiculturalism of South Africa. A professor of mine in Pretoria, Maake Masango, did CPE and advised me that the multidisciplinary approach will prepare me for ministry. My Columbia Seminary advisor, Prof George Stroup, has remarked that ‘you never know the true contents of your theology until you have it tested in a pastoral situation.’ I wish to discover what I really believe, and to take hold of this valuable opportunity while I can.
As to future vocational plans, I am a student of the ministry of the UPCSA, seeking ordination within the denomination. My goal within this path to ordination is not to be content with ministry in a comfortable white, middle-class, conservative congregation. I wish to be pushing the boundaries and set ideas of what church is, working for an authentic South African Christian faith expression and community, and impacting the church's place within society. To do this I will have to be comfortable in my understanding of my pastoral identity. Unfortunately in 5 years of theological studies, I have only had two pastoral care courses, so wish to add a CPE unit to this before I enter probation and ordination.
I know we will have to create set, measurable goals in the program, but for now here are four specific goals that come to mind for my CPE experience:
• to embrace the full array of South African experiences
• to discover further who I am, and why I respond to situations as I do
• to gain clarity on my sense of pastoral calling and vocation
• to open myself to pain and hopelessness
Doesn't it just sound like sooo much fun ;)